Some of My Favourite Quotes....

• There are three types of people in this world: those who make things happen, those who watch things happen and those who wonder what happened.
• A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon without springs, jolted by every pebble in the road.
• Seven days without laughter make one weak.
• If raising children was going to be easy, it never would have started with something called labour.
• Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.
• He who smiles in a crisis has found someone to blame.
• I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted paychecks.
• No one ever says it's only a game when their team is winning.
• I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that I don't know the answer.
• I can resist everything except temptation.
• Always and never are two words you should always remember never to use.
• An expert is a man who tells you a simple thing in a confused way in such a fashion as to make you think the confusion is your own fault.
• Reading, after a certain age, diverts the mind too much from its creative pursuits. Any man who reads too much and uses his own brain too little falls into lazy habits of thinking.
• The problem is never how to get new, innovative thoughts into your mind but how to get the old ones out.
• Experience is a wonderful thing. It enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.
• A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you will look forward to the trip.
• Good judgment comes from bad experience and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.
• Before software can be reusable it first has to be usable.
• Finding good players is easy. Getting them to play as a team is another story.
• Art is work, to sell it is art.
• Don't walk as if you rule the world, walk as if you don't care who rules the world.
• Intelligence is like underwear, everyone has it but you don't have to show it off.
• Leadership is the art of getting someone else to do something you want done because he wants to do it.
• Walking on water and developing software from a specification are easy if both are frozen.
• The best thing about a boolean is even if you are wrong, you are only off by a bit.
• There are two ways to write error-free programs; only the third one works.
• Programming is like sex. One mistake and you have to support it for the rest of your life.
• Diplomats are just as essential in starting a war as soldiers are in finishing it.
• Life is so much funnier when you have a dirty mind.
• War does not determine who is right - only who is left.
• I didn't say it was your fault; I said I was blaming you.
• If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong.
• My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I wanted a second opinion. He said okay, you're ugly too.
• You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.
• Hospitality: making your guests feel like they're at home, even if you wish they were.
• A bus is a vehicle that runs twice as fast when you are after it as when you are in it.
• The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on the list.
• I know that you believe you understand what you think I said, but I’m not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant.
• People who snore always fall asleep first.
• Whenever you see a woman and an opportunity don't screw the opportunity.
• The object of war is not to die for your country but to make the other bastard die for his. -General George Patton
• API design is like sex: make one mistake and support if for the rest of your life.
• The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.
• I learned law so well, the day I graduated I sued the college, won the case, and got my tuition back.  ~Fred Allen
• We judge others by their behavior. We judge ourselves by our intentions.
• If we were meant to talk more & listen less, we’d have two mouths & one ear.
• Learn from the mistakes of others. You can't live long enough to make them all yourself.
• Only 2 People r alwayz counted & credited - 1 who defines the problem 2nd who concludes from the solution. Problem Solvers remain in Dark.
• Debugging is twice as hard as writing the code in the first place. Therefore, if you write the code as cleverly as possible, you are, by definition, not smart enough to debug it.
• I'm so poor that I can't afford to pay attention.
• God made man before woman to give him time to think of an answer for her first question.
• Even if you are on the right track, you will get run over if you just sit there.
• I find television very educational. Every time someone switches it on I go into another room and read a good book.
• The politicians divide the country by Words, while the terrorists unite it with bullets.
• The right to be heard does not automatically include the right to be taken seriously.
• When you ASSUME, it makes an ASS out of U and ME.
• Under capitalism man exploits man. Under socialism it's just the opposite.
• The closest to perfection a person ever comes is when he fills out a job application.

Few interesting quotes by "Einstein"

• Black holes are where God divided by zero.
• Coincidence is God's way of remaining anonymous.
• It is not that I'm so smart. But I stay with the questions much longer.
• The hardest thing in the world to understand is the income tax.
• Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.
• Science is a wonderful thing if one does not have to earn one's living at it.
• The only thing that interferes with my learning is my education.
• The most incomprehensible thing about the world is that it is comprehensible.
• We can't solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them.
• Education is what remains after one has forgotten everything he learned in school.
• Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.
• Any man who can drive safely while kissing a pretty girl is simply not giving the kiss the attention it deserves.
• If A is a success in life, then A equals x plus y plus z. Work is x; y is play; and z is keeping your mouth shut.
• Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the the universe.
• As far as the laws of mathematics refer to reality, they are not certain, as far as they are certain, they do not refer to reality.
• I know not with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones.
• In order to form an immaculate member of a flock of sheep one must, above all, be a sheep.
• No, this trick won't work. How on earth are you ever going to explain in terms of chemistry and physics so important a biological phenomenon as first love?
• Not everything that counts can be counted, and not everything that can be counted counts.
• A person who never made a mistake never tried anything new.
• An empty stomach is not a good political adviser.
• Any intelligent fool can make things bigger and more complex. It takes a touch of genius - and a lot of courage to move in the opposite direction.
• Any man who reads too much and uses his own brain too little falls into lazy habits of thinking.
• There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.
• The difference between genius and stupidity is; genius has its limits.
• I have no special talents. I am only passionately curious.
• Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.
• With fame I become more and more stupid, which of course is a very common phenomenon.
• A little knowledge is a dangerous thing. So is a lot.

source: http://www.goodreads.com/author/quotes/9810.Albert_Einstein

Some good Quotes

Here are some of my favourite quotes, I collected them over a period of time, not in any particular order.

Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer. -Dave Barry

Imagination was given to man to compensate him for what he is not; a sense of humor to console him for what he is. -Francis Bacon

It takes a lot of experience for a girl to kiss like a beginner. -Ladies Home Journal

Seven days without laughter make one weak. - Joel Goodman

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat all day drinking beer.

If raising children was going to be easy, it never would have started with something called labour!

Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.

10 Terrorists came by Boat, 539 terrorists will come by your vote, vote Carefully

You shouldn't say it is not good. You should say, you do not like it; and then, you know, you're perfectly safe.

Always and never are two words you should always remember never to use.

Children: You spend the first 2 years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next 16 years telling them to sit down and shut-up.

The main purpose of holding children's parties is to remind yourself that there are children more awful than your own.

I learned law so well, the day I graduated I sued the college, won the case, and got my tuition back.  ~Fred Allen

We judge others by their behavior. We judge ourselves by our intentions.

If we were meant to talk more & listen less, we’d have two mouths & one ear.

The problem is never how to get new, innovative thoughts into your mind but how to get the old ones out.

People ask you for criticism but they only want praise.

Brains are like mouths; when empty they blather, when full they digest. - Pete Harrison

If you make people think they're thinking, they'll love you, but if you really make them think, they'll hate you.

Common sense is the most widely shared commodity in the world, for every man is convinced that he is well supplied with it. - Rene Decartes

Learn from the mistakes of others. You can't live long enough to make them all yourself. -

Being successful is like being pregnant , everyone congratulates you but no one knows how much you got screwed to get there.

A clever person solves a problem. A wise person avoids it. ~ Einstein

God gives and forgives. Man get and forgets.

Men are like bank accounts. Without a lot of money they don't generate a lot of interest.

Good judgment comes from bad experience and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.

The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the ability to reach it.

Time is what keeps everything from happening at once.

Theory is when you know something, but it doesn't work. Practice is when something works, but you don't know why. Programmers combine theory and practice: Nothing works and they don't know why.

To err is human. To keep erring is inhuman.

Inside every large program, there is a small program trying to get out.

Debugging is twice as hard as writing the code in the first place. Therefore, if you write the code as cleverly as possible, you are, by definition, not smart enough to debug it.

There are two ways to write error-free programs; only the third works.

If debugging is the process of removing bugs, then programming must be the process of putting them in.

If a million monkeys were typing on computers, one of them will eventually write a Java program. The rest of them will write Perl programs.

The key to understanding recursion is to begin by understanding recursion. The rest is easy.

In software, the chain isn't as strong as its weakest link; it's as weak as all the weak links multiplied together.

I'm so poor that I can't afford to pay attention.

There are two rules for success: 1.) Don't tell all you know.

Art is work, to sell it is art.

God made man before woman to give him time to think of an answer for her first question.

A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.

All desirable things in life are either-- illegal, banned, expensive or married to someone else!

Bad is never good until worse happens.

It is the woman who chooses the man who will choose her.

Time you enjoy wasting, is not wasted.

I find television very educational. Every time someone switches it on I go into another room and read a good book.

Intelligence is like underwear, everyone has it but you don't have to show it off.

The politicians divide the country by Words, while the terrorists unite it with bullets!!!
       
Radar spelled backwards is radar. They get you coming and going.

When you ASSUME, it makes an ASS out of U and ME.

The closest to perfection a person ever comes is when he fills out a job application.

API design is like sex: make one mistake and support if for the rest of your life.

You can also view some interesting Gtalk status messages here.